Friday, September 27, 2013
Putnam, a lawyer for AEG Live said.
Putnam remarked in a closing arguments of the wrongful death
lawsuit brought by relatives of the late King of Pop.
Jackson's family blame the concert promoter for his June 2009
death on the eve of his sold-out comeback tour, claiming the
company hired Jackson's doctor and pressured him to bend medical
rules in order to ensure the tour would go ahead.
But in his closing arguments, Putnam denied that the company had
hired Dr. Conrad Murray, pointing out that he had been treating
Jackson and his family for years before the tour.
The News Agency of Nigeria reports that Murray was found guilty
of providing the insomniac Jackson with the surgical anesthetic
Propofil as a sleeping aid, which a coroner found had caused
"The evidence is very clear that Michael Jackson was the one who
hired Dr. Murray.
"Jackson was responsible for his own health, certainly his own
healthcare, and he's responsible for his own choices, no matter
how bad those choices turn out to be.
"The truth here is a tragedy … It's a tragedy for this family, a
tragedy for his mother, a tragedy for his kids. It's horrible and it's
incredibly sad. But it's not a tragedy of AEG Live's making," Putnam
The lawyer insisted that Jackson never told AEG Live about his
reliance on the dangerous medication.
"AEG would have never agreed to finance this tour if they knew
Mr. Jackson was playing Russian roulette in his bedroom every
night," Putnam told jurors.
During the five-month trial, AEG Live argued that it was Jackson
who hired Murray.
Murray is due to be released next month after serving two years in
prison following his conviction for the involuntary manslaughter of
the late pop star.
Source: News agency of Nigeria
Khloe kardashian-odom drops odom from surname on twitter yesterday.
Khloe -29 went by khloe kardashian odom on twitter but with her 4 year marriage to lamar odom under pressure, she changed her display name to just khloe yesterday - her wedding anniversary
Their relationship has been under a lot of pressure recently amid rumours that the basketball player cheated on her with several women and suggestions that he is a regular cocaine user.
Earlier this week, khloe kardashian ditched her married name from her instagram account where she has been posting inspirational messages such as , "She smiles to mask the pain in the
heart, she laughs to conceal the tears in her eyes," and
"Sometimes you just got to be your own little hero and save your
own little heart".
Khloe recently kicked Lamar out of their marital home is reported
to have given Lamar an ultimatum, stating that he either shows her
a commitment to sort out his life or prepare himself for divorce.
The deadline for her ultimatum was allegedly yesterday.
A source said: "Khloe is giving Lamar until their four-year wedding
anniversary to show some sign he still wants to be in their
marriage. If not she's filing for divorce."
There is this saying ' whatever is worth doing at all is worth doing well'. I remember when I was in secondary school and I was in the library that day going through the Guinness World records of that year and something caught my attention. Something about a man being the world's most clapper ( I can't remember the exact words now) but the man was awarded the person that claps most in the world!
Somebody noticed him because he sits in the front row at shows and claps a lot!
Clapping? I know it sounds unthinkable and I'm sure he was just doing his thing without knowing anybody was paying attention to him.
Now, we all should strive hard to put our best foot forward in whatever we do. What I realized is that most people do things to get approval from a higher authority (boss, parents..) And when those people are not there, they revert to doing bad things, but I don't think it should be like that, you should do things not because people will complement you and call you a good person, but you should do it because you really want to...
I know this will touch that one person's heart it is meant for...
Have a good day everyone!
Miley cyrus talked about her drug use "weed is so much better than cocaine"
She told Rolling Stone magazine " One time I smoked a joint with
peyote in it, and I saw a wolf howling at the moon.
"Hollywood is a coke town, but weed is so much better. And Molly
Cyrus describes them as "Those are happy drugs - social drugs.
They make you want to be with friends. You're out in the open.
You're not in a bathroom."
Twenty year old Miley Cyrus isn't a fan of the class-A drug -
which she described as "so gross" - because it feels too dated.
She adds: "I really don't like coke. It's so gross and so dark.
"It's like, what are you, from the '90s? Ew."
Miley describes the reasoning and message behind her latest video
'Wrecking Ball'. While people might "hate it" at first, she expects it
to become as iconic as Sinead O'Connor's 'Nothing Compares 2 U', in
which the singer - then bald - sings and cries at the camera.
In Cyrus's words: "I think people are going to hate it; they're going
to see my ass and be like, 'Oh my God, I can't believe she did that'.
"And then when we get to the bridge, they're gonna have a little
tear and be like, 'F**k you!' I think it will be one of those iconic
videos, too. I think it's something that people are not gonna forget.
She really isn't hannah montana again
He was caught recently as the guards noticed the athlete looking a bit lumpy underneath his prison clothes. He also seemed to have something to hide.
That something turned out to be about a dozen oatmeal biscuits.
The insider revealed, "O.J. has been trying to diet since the
doctors talked to him, but he loves sweets, and after a few
weeks he couldn't take it anymore."
The whole incident went down with a few laughs, though.
"Everyone thought he had smuggled in a cell phone or some other
kind of contraband, so when the guard started pulling cookies out
of O.J.'s shirt, the other inmates started laughing so hard they
nearly fell over," the source explained. "O.J. just stood there with
a goofy grin on his face as the guard kept digging inside his shirt
and throwing the cookies on the floor."
Luckily for the former NFL player, the guards took a softer
approach to the infraction.
The source said, "The guard told O.J. that he could be written up
for cookies, but let him go with a warning not to let it happen
Simpson kept in shape even after he retired, but his weight has
crept up on him in prison. He's reportedly up to 300 pounds and
is suffering from high blood pressure in addition to his diabetes
It seems that the fallen sports star finds "the only enjoyment he
has left in his life is eating his favorite foods."
The source concluded, "To tell the truth, he really doesn't care
what happens to him anymore."
The armed robbery charge is only one of his legal troubles. In
1995, he was acquitted of murdering his ex-wife Nicole Brown
Simpson and her alleged boyfriend Ron Goldman. He began his
current sentence in 2008.
Below, you will find a full list of the 25 richest rappers in the world today.
The Richest Rappers In The World 2013:
1. Diddy – Net Worth: $580 million (up $80 million)
2. Jay-Z – Net Worth: $500 million (up $25 million)
3. Dr. Dre – Net Worth: $360 million (up $100 million)
4. Master P – Net Worth: $350 million (no change)
5. 50 Cent – Net Worth: $260 million (up $10 million)
6. Birdman – Net Worth: $150 million (up $35 million)
7. Eminem – Net Worth: $140 million (up $20 million)
8. Snoop Dogg – Net Worth: $130 million (up $10 million)
9. Ice Cube – Net Worth: $120 million (up $20 million)
10. Lil Wayne – Net Worth: $110 million (up $15 million)
11. Kanye West – Net Worth: $100 million (up $10 million)
12. LL Cool J – Net Worth: $85 million (up $5 million)
13. Timbaland – Net Worth: $80 million (up $5 million)
14. Pharrell Williams – Net Worth: $80 million (up $2.5 million)
15. Akon – Net Worth: $80 million (up $2.5 million)
16. Beastie Boys - $75 million each (no change)
17. Ludacris – Net Worth: $75 million (up $5 million)
18. Busta Rhymes – Net Worth: $65 million (up $5 million)
19. Nelly – Net Worth: $60 million (no change)
20. T.I. – Net Worth: $40 million (up $10 million)
21. Big Boi – Net Worth: $40 million (no change)
22. T-Pain – Net Worth: $35 million (up $5 million)
23. Ice-T – Net Worth: $35 million (up $5 million)
24. Drake – Net Worth: $30 million (up $5 million)
25. Rick Ross – Net Worth: $28 million (up $3 million)
26. Nicki Minaj – Net Worth $25 million (up $5 million)
Wednesday, August 14, 2013
"So what happened to you?" I asked him.
He snorted "I've blocked out some memories so I can't really tell you".
"But you just said you had your fair share of love and heartache. Surely you must remember some things".
"If you lose, don't lose the lesson". He murmured. "I may have chosen to forget the incidences that tore me apart, but I don't forget the lessons they taught me. So though I may not tell you what happened to me exactly, I can still give you advice".
"Okay knock yourself out big brother". I said sarcastically.
"Hey, I have known you since you were a kid. We grew up together. We may not be related by blood, but guess what, I'm the only brother you've ever known".
"Yeah and Geena was the only sister I ever knew and look what she did to me..." I said glumly.
"At least we've never been best friends when we were growing up. You used to hate me".
"What makes you think I still don't hate you?" . I raised a brow at him.
"Fair enough" he said coolly. "At least you don't expect me to be nice. If I say that hurt your feelings, remember that I've always been like that".
"You're the first one that taught me how to be immune. To tune it all out".
"Yes. But you are not a very good student, are you?" He asked.
"Why do you say that?"
"Because that's what you should be doing now. Tuning out. I don't think you know how to do that".
I sighed. " There are times that I thought I can. But then again, it gets so hard. It was painful." Tears started rolling down my cheeks. " It's still painful".
"I know" he said. "Don't think that it will go away soon. Physically, it hurts, like your chest aches. You know that's why they call it a heart break. Because you feel like your heart is breaking. It's not just an emotional pain, it's a physical pain too. And you have to face it, Ash. There is no running away from it".
"I know. But it's difficult not to remember. You know,I didn't only lose a boyfriend or a fiancé for that. I also lost a best friend. Geena has been there most of my childhood . She was a sister. And I can't get over the fact that the two people I loved and trusted most will do this to me".
"Geena has always been liberated. You know that. You were the only person in the world who trusted her too much. When we were growing up, I thought she was a spoilt brat. But you worshipped the land she walked on. She made out with one of the guys you dated in high school, one hour after you broke up with him
Monday, August 12, 2013
100 years later, eighth graders are examined on...twerking?
An eighth grade 'common exam' from 1912 was recently donated to the bulitt county history museum in kentucky also available in full on their website. And it's hard... The site also explains that, "it should not be used to compare students knowledge then and now".
A museum volunteer David Lee Strange told ABC news "for us, this is just fascinating, it puts us in the mindset of 1912" . The site explains that students came together every year to take this test once or twice and it was a big deal with scholarships for high school given out to students who excelled.
SO ARE YOU SMARTER THAN AN EIGHTH GRADER FROM 1912?
Those are the questions above.
yesterday arraigned before an Ikeja Magistrate Court, over
attempted murder, of his sister, Esther Erazele.
Erazele, who was docked before Magistrate Margaret Dan-
Oni, is facing a count charge of attempted murder preferred
against him by the police.
It was said that the defendant had accused Esther, who
resides in the same house with him, of bewitching him
whenever he planned to get married.
It was said that he used to see her in his dream, whenever he
is with a woman that he wanted to get married to and she used
to prevent him from getting married, which prompted him to hit
her with a hammer on the head and also twisted her neck.
The police prosecutor, Inspector Edet Okoi, told the court that
the defendant committed the alleged crime on August 3, 2013,
at about 8 pm, at 29, Ifekoya Street in Agege area of Lagos
He said that the defendant, while inside the room with his
sister used hammer to hit her head severally.
Okoi said the defendant also twisted the victim's neck, in order
to strangle her.
However, when the charges were read to the defendant, he
pleaded not guilty.
Magistrate Dan-Oni granted him bail in the sum of N200,000
with two responsible sureties, who are gainfully employed,
resident in Lagos State. One of the sureties must be a clergy
man while one must reside in his property and show evidence
of tax payment and address verified.
She adjourned the case to October 2, 2013, for mention and
ordered that the defendant be remanded in Kirikiri prison,
pending when he is able to perfect his bail conditions.
Read more: Vanguard Newspapers
The Bieby Biebs showed off his all grown up, tatted up bod when hegot nekkid, with only a guitar covering his famous junk, for an impromptu XXX-rated Canadian Thanksgiving serenade.
The acclaimedsinger-songwriter spat out some heartfelt words like:
"I Loooove you grandmaaaa … how are youuuu … helloooo grandma."
How giving of him! LOLz!
Fortunately, G got the joke and laughed along with the rest of the family, but we're sure she was just thankfulshe didn't see his giblets! HA!
When Dawn Taylor walks down the street hand in hand with
her two young sons, she looks like any other devoted mum.
But Dawn, 31, is not like other mothers. She has multiple
personalities – an astonishing 22 of them.
Each personality has its own voice, traits and mannerisms.
They can come and go up to 10 times a day, changing without
warning in a split second.
They include brothel keeper Madam Taylor, five-year-old
schoolgirl Daisy, PC World worker Mary, 60, and aggressive
There are also a millionaire, Scottish sandwich shop owner,
Cornish farm girl, German speaker and a gangsta rapper.
It is Tiger-Lou, a woman about Dawn's age, who greets us for
our interview. But within 30 minutes Dawn is back.
"I feel like I spend half my life drunk," says Dawn, who cannot
recall what happens when another personality takes over.
"At the time I think I am in control. To me, I am just me, whether
that's Daisy, Mary or even Madam Taylor. But when I wake up
and can't remember a thing the terror sets in."
Dawn, who lives with long-term partner Dean, 36, and their
children Connor, 10, and seven-year-old Troy, was diagnosed
with Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) – also known as
Multiple Personality Disorder – in June.
It followed years of erratic behaviour, which started with
depression after Connor's birth.
Dawn once woke covered in blood with scissors in her hand.
She has tried to throttle a stranger and threatened to blow up
her friend's house. Supermarket visits are not easy.
Dawn, of Clacton-on-Sea, Essex, says: "I often throw food
off the shelves. I come round and have no idea why I've done it.
"It's like the other personalities are trying to get me into
trouble. Some of them hate Dean and make me say spiteful
things to him, even though I love him dearly.
"I found text messages to a friend in my sent-box, telling her I
was outside her house and that I was going to hurt her. I had to
call and apologise and tell her it was someone else. I felt awful.
"Other personalities even hate the real me. Once I woke up to
find a swear word cut on my thigh.
"The scissors were in my hand and there was blood
everywhere. I couldn't remember doing it.
"The only saving grace is that they all love my children. But that
doesn't stop me worrying about what one of them might do."
Anguished Dawn says: "I just want to be a normal mum."
The former model, who cannot work because of her condition,
adds: "Sometimes, simple things I do as Dawn are a major
problem for the other personalities."I used to cycle
everywhere but once I was riding through town with Troy in a
seat on the back. Connor was riding in front when suddenly I
switched into little Daisy, who can't cycle. I lost all ability to
ride, smashed into Connor and we all fell off. A few weeks ago
I came round and was hanging upside down from a tree in the
"It sounds funny but it was terrifying. One of my child
personalities must have climbed up there but when I snapped
out of it I couldn't get down."
Dawn – who takes sedatives, mood stabilisers and anti-
depressants Quetiapine, Carbamazepine and Paroxetine to
control her condition – is used to people laughing at her and
tries to be philosophical about it.
She says: "One of the teenage girl personalities does cheer-
leading. I have woken up in the town centre surrounded by
people clapping after I have done a routine. My sons think it's
funny so I try to laugh along but for me it's really embarrassing.
"The boys can take advantage, too. I have one personality they
call Rich Lady, who seems to think she has a huge fortune.
"When she comes out they make me buy them expensive toys
and sweets. When I snap back I realise what they've done.
"I woke up once in the living room surrounded by boxes of Lego,
computer games and consoles they had made her buy."
But life wasn't always like this. Dean, who met Dawn when she
was 18, recalls: "She was a beautiful model, full of fun and
"We were so in love.
"Then after Connor was born we were driving down the road
one day when she wound down the window and started
shouting abuse at someone walking by.
"It was out of character and I asked what she was doing. She
looked at me like I was mad. She couldn't remember a thing."
Doctors at first suspected Tourette's syndrome, but the fact
that Dawn couldn't remember her outbursts suggested
something more serious.
Her erratic behaviour began to take on a pattern.
Dean says: "The first personality to emerge was Lashes. One
day after an outburst, I called her Dawn and she told me that
wasn't her name.
"Gradually, Lashes came out as a very angry teenage girl who
didn't like me. I would get texts telling me I was useless.
"She told me she hated me and warned me not to come home
"More personalities started to appear. Sometimes Mary
arrives. She works in PC World and wakes up at 5am and tells
me she has to go do a stock-take. I try to convince her she
doesn't work there.
"When I ask how she is going to get to the shop, she doesn't
know where it is, becomes very confused and comes back to
"Other times she is Daisy, who sits on the floor and draws for
hours. There are other children and when Dawn is one of them,
her handwriting is like a child's.
"Another of the personalities speaks German – which Dawn
only learnt briefly at school.
"Then there is Madam Taylor, who owns a brothel. I tried to
explain to Madam Taylor that she is actually Dawn.
"Now I ignore her because the doctors think the more you
interact with the other personalities, the stronger they get.
Some are far stronger than others and emerge much more
"It was scary at first but gradually the personalities have
become part of my life. It's like living with 22 different people.
Some smoke and even like cigars even though Dawn has never
The illness has taken its toll on the couple's love life.
Dean says: "My mates joke that it must be amazing, getting to
go to bed with 22 different women.
"But what about when I go to bed with a brothel madam, then
part way through she switches to a five-year-old child? I'm
lost. I love Dawn but what we have isn't a relationship any
more, it's a way of life – survival.
"I could never leave her or my boys but this illness has taken
away the woman I fell in love with. People ask if I hope to get
her back. Of course I do. I have to, otherwise I would go mad."
Dawn has just one session with a consultant psychiatrist
every three months.
The drugs ease the problem but she has been told there is no
proven cure. NHS cuts mean the mental health clinic in Clacton
could be closed.
Dean says: "If that happens I don't know what we are going to
do. It took years just to get a proper diagnosis."
Analytical psychotherapist Remy Aquarone, who has treated
people with Dawn's condition for 25 years, said: "Less than
one per cent of the population suffers from DID but many are
misdiagnosed with depression or other conditions".
Mr Aquarone, former president of the European Society for
Trauma and Dissociation, said: "The most separate
personalities I have seen in one person is 12, so Dawn's case is
"She is in desperate need of regular and sustained
psychotherapy at least once a week. It is very difficult to get
this kind of help on the NHS."
DAWN'S ALTER EGOS
THE REAL DAWN
A lovely 31-year old who is a loving mother to Troy and Connor.
This troubled teenager has a volatile temper and swears a lot.
She sends Dean scary texts trying to break off their
TIGER-LILY and TIGER-LOU:
Related girls a similar age to Dawn and closest to her own
personality. Dawn's family are often the only ones who can tell
when she is in one of these characters.
A five-year-old girl who loves colouring and spends hours
using Troy and Connor's crayons. She is Troy's favourite
personality because she likes to play with the boys.
This six-year-old is obsessed with building Lego and
SpongeBob SquarePants – even though it's a family joke that
Dawn can't stand either.
A 60-year-old shop assistant who was made redundant from
her job at office suppliers Staples and now works at PC
World. She was devastated when she read in the local paper
that the local branch was closing down.
Young agricultural worker who claims she has a combine
harvester and talks to the children about farm animals.
An older woman who keeps a brothel. She drove past a derelict
building and said it would be the perfect place for her "girls" to
do their trade.
Millionaire who spends uncontrollably and showers her family
with gifts. She once spent the whole weekly budget on Lego
and games consoles for the boys.
She is a pyromaniac who has an obsession with red cigarette
lighters. Once she even set fire to real money in the wood
burner in the back garden.
A girl who calls everyone "Chaz" – including her children,
partner and friends – and has a strong London accent.
Scottish sandwich shop owner who wakes Dean in the middle
of the night to make deliveries and pick up ingredients.
A woman who switches to speaking her native language in
mid-conversation and gets frustrated when her family can't
These include a gangsta rapper who talks in ghetto rhymes
and four children too shy to give their names. One likes to jump
in the paddling pool fully clothed. And there are three teens
who self-harm and send threatening texts to Dawn's friends.
Read more: Mirror News
Of course, a lot has happened since last year — BlackBerry 10 finally launched in 2013, but so far the new OS hasn't stopped the bleedingfor the formerly-dominant company. According to IDC, BlackBerry's marketshare in the mobilie OS race is only 2.9 percent — both the dominant Android and the growing Windows Phone platforms are chipping away at what's left of BlackBerry's base. There's a chance nothing comes of this, as the company warns in its press release, but it looks like the company is more serious than ever at finding a new way to stay afloat and relevant in the mobile marketplace.
Source: The Verge.
Here is what he said:
David Blum: Part of the American dream — even if you're poor, or lower-middle class — involves yearning for tangible things you can't afford. Were there things, when you were growing up, that you yearned for that you couldn't afford?
Obama:"I don't think people went around saying to themselves, 'I need to have a 10,000-square-foothouse.' I think there has also been a shift in culture… There was not that window into the lifestyles of the rich and famous… Kids weren't monitoring every day what Kim Kardashian was wearing, or where Kanye West was going on vacation, and thinking that somehow that was the mark of success."
[From The Business Insider]
Obama could have name-checked any conspicuous-consuming celebrity and it still would have had the same point: the American dream should not be confused with the aspirational wealth and materialism of celebrities. The American dream used to be"work hard, get an education, get a good job and raise your healthy children."His argument is about the shrinking middle class, the fragmented safety net and yes, about the culture of celebrity and celebutainment. But that nuance was lost on Kris Jenner. She went on her talk show and said this:
"I wasn't aware that you could only set the bar so high and that you could only dream so big. I was taught dream big, work hard and you could have whatever you wanted. I bet the President has some friends with 10,000 square foot houses and that he wouldn't mind going over there… when [he was] asking them to have a party for [him] while [he was] campaigning for dollars to run for president. I find it so odd that he's picking on Kim Kardashian and Kanye West. Well, Kanye West, first of all, doesn't go on vacation ever… and Kim Kardashian is the hardest working young lady in the world. She never sleeps, she never stops, she never slows down and works so hard for what she's got. Her job affords her to live in a 10,000 square foot house and I think, if I'm not mistaken, that Mr. President's job affords him to live in a 55,000 square foot house."
[Transcribed by Michael K at Dlisted]
If she had simply made the argument that all of us can dream big and that there are no bounds for what you can achieve… I might have been with her. Truly. But then she turns it into a shill for how Kim is the"hardest working young lady in the world."Bitch, you lie. Most people DO aspire to great wealth and a nice home, but let's not pretend that it's somehow good for our country or our culture when little girls say "I want to make a p0rn and have my mom sell it so I can be famous and live in a big house."
Sunday, August 11, 2013
A former engineering student, Abramson recruited the help of two former professors to create cocktailware that could potentially help thwart drug-facilitated sexual assault. Aside from the 16-ounce plastic cups, DrinkSavvy is also producing straws that shift color when in the presence of these date rape drugs. That makes for an easier tool for backers to carry around, and the company hopes to offer an expanded line of products to the public sometime in 2014. Rape crisis centers will have free access to the glassware, and DrinkSavvy is hoping that colleges will make its technology a central part of their rape prevention initiatives.
SOURCE: the Verge
certain surgical procedures, hormonal imbalances within the
body's endocrine system and chemotherapy. However, some of
the other most common reasons for loss of fertility are quite
We have listed these here.
Requirements for fertility: Investigating the
complex biological process
A recent Wall Street Journal article points out that popular
culture focuses a great deal of attention on the effort, timing,
and planning put into fertility by women, even though the
process of ensuring fertility is actually quite complicated for
men as well. First, the body has to be functioning properly so
that it creates sperm within the testicles, at the astronomical
level of at least 15 million sperm per milliliter of semen. Hormonal
imbalances or biological damages can be the primary cause of
decreased sperm production. Second, the system of tubing
within the genitals must be unblocked and functioning properly
in order to carry the sperm into the semen and prepare the
mixture for ejaculation. This tubing is very fragile, and
sometimes requires treatment in terms of repairing tears, or
removing clogged portions. Furthermore, the sperm created by
the body may be healthy and in proper counts, but may not
have the movement levels or proper shape to be able to swim
to a partner's egg and penetrate it. Since there is a great deal
of stigma surrounding male fertility, many men are not aware
that the process of impregnating their partners can be
affected by some common behavioral choices.
Dangerous risks to male fertility
As aforementioned, fertility levels are determined by a complex
process with many fragile factors. Since this biological
process is so complex, it presents many areas in which your
fertility levels might be lessened, whether your sperm becomes
unhealthy or reduces in number, are not transported well into
the semen, or if the motility and morphology of the sperm are
LAPTOPS OVERHEATING THE GENITAL AREA: When the
testicles overheat, they tend to produce less sperm and
often, computers that we hold on our laps are enough to
cause both temporary and permanent damage to the region.
Using saunas or hot tubs frequently also produces the same
effect within the body.
Alcohol abuse: Drinking can present many health risks, but
few men realise that alcohol can actually lower your
testosterone levels. Besides leading to erectile dysfunction, an
abuse of alcohol can permanently decrease the production of
sperm and also lower the mobility levels and general health of
the sperm themselves.
OBESITY: With all of the talk about weight inspired by the
media, it seems like we really don't need one more motivator to
keep our BMIs under control. However, if you are looking for
that one last bit of inspiration to get you to the gym or to put
down that slice of pizza, consider this: being overweight can
throw your hormonal system off-balance and lead to lower
BICYCLING: Though riding your bike is a fantastic way to get
the body in shape, it has been shown to lead to damage within
the perineum and testicles, both of which can lower the count
of healthy sperm within the semen. The same effect is often
produced through the use of motorcycles, and also through
High-stress occupations: Turns out, a stressful work
environment can increase your risk of infertility by reducing
healthy sperm count. Furthermore, scientists have noticed that
extended use of computers and other visual display monitors
can trigger hormonal reactions that leave testosterone levels
imbalanced. Don't expect your boss to be accommodating,
however, see if there are changes you can make within your
own working style to reduce stress that you face while on the
Of course, there are many other biological and hormonal
reasons that fertility might be affected by, some of which are
not preventable. But without a doubt, staying informed about
the most common behaviours that lead to a decrease in sperm
count and potency will help to ensure that you enjoy a more
Perhaps the risk of fertility loss that these activities and
behaviors present is not worth you changing your behaviors.
However, by staying informed, you know that you'll make
better choices. If you have any fertility concerns, it is best
that you speak to your primary care physician and undergo
proper tests to determine whether fertility treatment might
Read this article in Times of India
I met up with my friends. I could tell they were all getting bored with me. I whined about the usual things like how I had known bryan since college days and we had been friends first before we dated and how I've known Geena since I was little and never in my wildest dreams had I imagined that she would betray me like she did.
Dannie Jones my gay best friend became the most impatient. He had listened to me enough. I guess.
John, my guy best friend was the angriest for what Bryan did to me.
Nicole was the most sympathetic for my feelings.
"I wonder how he is now" I asked.
"Oh for crying out loud" Dannie muttered
"Ash, please! don't do this, you are beautiful, you are smart! You have your whole life ahead of you!"
"No!, I don't, I will be thirty in a few months!"
"You will be thirty in twenty three months!" John muttered. "That's plenty of time to score a guy a lot better than bryan".
"But we've been together for two years! Do you know how much work that took?!"
"A lot!, since you have been witholding sex!" Dannie said brutally.
"But what is wrong with...no sex before marriage?"
"Nothing!" Only that you open him up to readily available sluts within a mile proximity" john said.
"Look Ash, if he couldn't wait, then he isn't the guy" Nicole said. " And if he really did love you, he wouldn't have the nerve to sleep with Geena. If he had an inch of decency in his body, he would have remembered that Geena is your cousin!"
"Relationships are not important to a horny guy" John butted in.
"Apparently". I rolled my eyes.
"So now, what are you going to do with your life?"
I shrugged "drink it away?" I said sarcatiscally and took another gulp of my beer.
"Look at you, Ash! How can a gorgeous girl who is sweet and smart waste her life on a loser like bryan? I mean, no offence but he's not nearly that hot!" Dannie said in a frustrated voice.
"And he's short. What is he? Like five feet tall?" John chuckled.
"Hey!, he's five feet six!" I said defensively. " And his chocolate eyes are dreamy".
"His eyes are brown! As plain as brown could be" ! Dannie argued.
" I just...couldn't think of a reason why he would do this to me!" I heaved another frustrated sigh.
John rolled his eyes "I can but you are not going to like it..."
"Sex?" I asked him "he only needed to wait three more months...after we are married" .
"Well., apparently, he can't wait nine months. Haven't they been sleeping with each other for good six months before you found them?" Dannie asked.
"For all you know Ash, he could have proposed to you just to get you into bed". John stated.
"Not with the size of the ring he gave me" I said. Bryan gave me a two carat diamond ring. It costs a fortune. He wouldn't sprudge on that if he was only after the sex. Will he?
"Speaking of the ring, where is it?" Dannie asked.
"In my jewelry box" I replied
"Hmm...you should have returned that weeks ago" john said.
"Hell no" Dannie argued. " Don't return it, pawn it!"
"No I'm not going to pawn that ring!"
"And why not?, you want to hold on to it and reminisce on the good times you spent together whenever you look at it?" Nicole asked in an irritated tone.
"We did have some good times"
"This is not the time to be thinking about the good times. That's a no brainer. Right now, for you to get over him, you have to think about every single annoying thing about him and every single irritating thing that he has ever done to you!" Nicole said.
"True. Right now you have to think of him as a monster. He has no heart! He has no conscience. Nicole said. This thing that you are in,he brought it upon you! Everything that he was before you broke up with him, was nothing. That's not the person he is now".
"You need a makeover. Find a hobby! Get a gym membership! Learn to play the guitar."
"Or you can always find a job." John suggested.
"I hope you have been saving money".
I sighed. "Of course...but unfortunately,I used some of it to pay the florist."
"I hope you had the guts to refund them". Nicole said.
I shook my head "I gave all the receipts to bryan when we broke up. I wanted to him to refund all the payments so that he'll know how painful it was for me to make those arrangements when he was humping my maid of honor".
"So let me get this thing straight". John said. "If he was able to refund the money you paid the florist, it means he cheated on you...and you paid him to do it?".
"Shut up john" . I told him, although I understood the irony he was aiming at.
"That settles it then! You have to pawn the ring". Dannie said. " With the size of that thing, you can pay for your own wedding".
I snorted. "That is if I still want to get married. I think I completely lost faith in love. If I see or come to another wedding in my life, I think I will hang myself! I don't believe in weddings anymore."
"Really?, then why do you still believe in engagement rings?". John asked.
"Why don't you want to pawn it for its worth? If you don't want to use the money for your future wedding, then use it as a down payment for your apartment" dannie suggested. " That could be at least ten grand. You are going to go a long way with that and trust me hon, you deserve it."
"I wish you would display the same angst about bryan and happily-ever-afters!" Nicole said. "If only you would be as optimistic as getting over bryan as you are about the doom of the weddings of the couples we were handling".
I know it was downright pathetic. During the first week, I was so mad at bryan, he was a liar! He was my bestfriend, how could he treat me like that.?
Then I was so mad at Geena, because in my opinion, she should have stopped things from happening. Bryan is merely a man. A man who had been harboring his sex drive since we started dating. His testosterone level was probably shooting rocket high when Geena showed a bit of flesh.
On the second week, I was mad at myself, I thought I was a self - righteous virgin who believed that a relationship these days could go a long way without intimacy.
On the third week, I was just mad at love itself... For leading me on, for making me believe that there was a happily-ever-after in store for me. For making me believe that the dream wedding I had in my head since I was ten years old would become a reality.
And now,I just don't know who or what I was mad at anymore. A part of me hurts so much sometimes that I think it would be damn easier if I just ran back to Bryan's arms and forgave him. But a bigger part of him can't trust him. Not anymore. A part of me says I have made it three weeks without him,with this pain. I can make it a few more, and then healing will come for sure.
When I got home that night, Adam was on his way to the deck with a beer in his hand.
"Half-pint" he greeted me.
"I'm not a kid anymore, Adam".
"Ha! See?, I learn something new everyday". He said sarcastically.
I rolled my eyes and started heading towards my room.
"Hey! Wait up" he said
I turned back to him.
"Join me". He said motioning towards his deck.
I raised a brow "no thanks, I better go to bed".
"And do what?" He asked with a raised brow. "Sleep? Mope? Dream that the bastard is going to magically develop a conscience for you?" He shook his head "come on, Ash. I've known you all your life. You are smarter than that. Maybe you just need a little push. Come drink with me at the deck, it's time you and I had a little heart-to-heart".
I sighed then followed him to the deck. The moonlight was beautiful. The sea breeze blew on my face. I sat on the chair beside adam's. He handed me a beer.
I took a gulp and waited for him to say something.
"It's been three weeks, Ash". He started "and you are looking worse". He sighed. I didn't reply "don't tell me that I don't know anything about pain. About love and heartache. Trust me, I've had my fair share. Maybe that's why I am what I am now. I've been hurt too much before".
For the first time, I saw Adam in a different light. The cold, ruthless facade...the brutal truth he always speaks, regardless of who will get hurt... Now I understood. He experienced pain. He had been lied to in the past. He had been betrayed before...that's why he resorted to the man he is now. A man who believed that brutal truth no matter how much it hurts is still a lot better than the sweetest of lies. And thus, he always says what is on his mind. He speaks the truth as he sees it is. He doesn't lead people on.
"What?" He asked when he realized I had been staring at him intensely.
I snorted and took a gulp of my beer "well, I guess this is the probably the first time I've seen evidence that you have a heart".
Here we go:
1). Having A Sense Of Humor
You should be able to make that woman crack up. Women find it sexy when a guy makes them laugh. Women think if he can make them laugh in public, chances are he can also make them giggle in bed.
2). Having Sensitivity
Sensitivity means having a sense of empathy, confidence and trust all rolled into one. A woman needs someone she can call anytime to talk to and he will be ready to listen. Although, having too much sensitivity can be considered feminine.
3). Being Able To Cook
Yeah!!!! Believe it or not. There is nothing as sexy as a guy who cooks! When a guy does well in the kitchen, it gets down well with most women.
4). Communication Skills
Guys please, Speak good english! No girl wants a guy she can't show off to her friends. If you can't communicate well, it is a No-No.
5). Having A Sense Of Style
It is not about the clothes you wear that make you sexy but how you carry your apparel with confidence and ease. It is not the clothes that appeal to the woman but the man wearing them. But at the same time, avoid unattractive clothes.
6). Aromatic Sense
If a man looks good and smells good, women are bound to swarm around him.
7). Eye Contact
A man who knows how to make eye contact is a man who knows how to communicate. It's the best way to show a woman you are listening to what she is saying. It makes her feel special and cared for.
Confidence makes a man! Make her feel protected. There is just something about a commanding vibe of aura and authority that a woman seeking a man cannot resist.
What most women first notice is your physical assets but what lingers in their mind is your masculinity. It is the way you move and talk that keeps a woman's eyes on you and creates her instinctive feelings of attraction.
A great smile is one of the greatest attraction of man. It makes a woman relax without any verbal language. This is why a man who is generous with his smile is guaranteed to maintain a women-magnet.
UNLUCKIEST MAN IN THE WORLD: Meet Apple Founder Who Missed Out Of $35 Billion After Selling His Shares For $800
Ron Wayne was one of the three original founders of Apple in
1976, along with Steves Wozniak and Jobs. Forty-two at the
time, Wayne provided much-needed adult supervision in a
company of young creatives.
Wayne drew the first Apple logo, wrote the three men's
original partnership agreement, and wrote the Apple I manual,
but his name is virtually unknown, and in the new Ashton
Kutcher biopic of Steve Jobs, his role in the tech giant's past
is glossed over.
Wayne, 79, hopes Jobs will reveal that the late design genius'
darker side – a side Wayne clashed with and which eventually
resulted in him selling his share of Apple for $800.
No regrets: Ron Wayne today at his home in Nevada says he
wouldn't change his decision to leave Apple
Founder: Ron Wayne in 1976, the year he, Jobs and Wozniak
founded a tech company called Apple
In this exclusive interview, Wayne lifts the lid on the true
nature of the iconic American innovator Jobs, who almost
single-handedly turned the electronic firm into a billion-dollar
Wayne says Jobs, though often viewed as a great public
speaker, was socially awkward and manipulative.
'If you had your choice between Steve Jobs and an ice cube
you would nestle up to the ice cube for warmth. It was
essentially his way or the highway in many of his business
decisions,' Wayne says.
'He was focused and had a determined attitude. If he had some
place he wanted to be, the last place you wanted to be was
between him and it, because you would have a footprint on
Wayne founded Apple Computer alongside 21-year-old Jobs
and 25-year old Steve Wozniak on April 1, 1976. The three
worked together at Atari.
Not even two weeks later, Wayne relinquished his 10 per cent
stock share of the company for just $800. Had he retained
his company shares, they would be worth $35 billion today.
'I made a decision that allowed me to pursue my interest. I
honestly don't regret walking away at all,' Wayne said.
'I knew the Wozniak design for a personal computer was going
to be a successful product. But who could have anticipated it
would be what it is today?
'If I had stayed with Apple and accepted the limitations on my
philosophy of life I could have well ended up the richest man in
the cemetery. I was in my 40s, these kids were whirlwinds. It
was like having a tiger by the tail.'
Bio: Ashton Kutcher as Steve Jobs in the new biopic about the
former Apple CEO
Empire: Despite his experience with the company, Ron Wayne
doesn't own any Apple products
Clips from the trailer of the movie show how Wayne's engineer
pal Wozniak built a home computer by hooking up circuits to his
TV set. Jobs had the vision then to work that technology into
what would become the Macs and laptops of today. Wayne's
role was to be the intermediary between the two innovators.
Wayne left Apple after he felt that Jobs' decision to splash
over a $1500 on parts for a product was ill-advised. In the
next few years, Jobs and Wozniak invited him back to rejoin
the firm, but Ron had decided he wanted to make it big in slot
'My passion was not in computers, but slot machines. It was a
handicap that I didn't realize I had no business sense. I learned
that when I went into business building slot machines instead,'
Early design: Ron Wayne still owns sketches that were the
blueprints for the Macs and laptops the company became
Around the world Jobs is viewed as a pioneer of modern
technology, who had an easy-going nature and dry sense of
humour. However, through their earliest dealings he noticed
that Jobs was an argumentative man prone to losing his
Unrecognizable: A design for an Apple logo Wayne created for
the company back in 1976
'He was a volatile man, definitely excitable,' Wayne recalls.
'Jobs had a temper and he was a very serious person because
he wanted work done instantly. He would argue with you or he
would walk out of the room if he didn't get his way.
'He had a point of view and he never bent from that, unless
you came out with one damn good argument. And that was
difficult because he had a steel trap mind.'
In 2003, Job was diagnosed with a rare and less aggressive
form of pancreatic cancer called pancreatic neuroendocrine
cancer. But rather than immediately remove the tumor growing
on his pancreas, Jobs kept a strict vegan diet with large
quantities of fresh carrot and fruit juices.
Add to that a regime of acupuncture, frequent bowel
cleansings and hydrotherapy.
Jobs continued seeking alternative diets and medicines for a
further nine months against the advice of doctors and his
Wayne says this was typical of Jobs, who always believed
that he knew better that everyone else – even his doctors.
'Jobs was a stubborn man. The things he believed in, he
believed absolutely. In many cases you could not convince him to
the contrary.'It wasn't until a CAT scan revealed that the
tumor had grown and possibly spread that Jobs underwent
surgery in 2004. He lost his battle with cancer in 2011 and
Wayne believes that it was his stubbornness and focus on
building Apple that cost him his life aged just 56.
'Rather than go to the doctor, Jobs wanted to treat the
situation himself. The things that were important to him he
knew and understood and had mastery of, but if it didn't fit
into his mind then he considered it trivia,' says Wayne.
Despite a premature end to his life, Wayne believes Jobs would
be happen with his lasting legacy.
'I think he found peace. He did exactly what he wanted in his
life. He got the result and was fully satisfied with his
achievement,' Wayne says.
Mementos: Wayne owns early sketches and blueprints from
Apple's very first years
Big decision: Ron Wayne left Apple in 1976 due to
disagreements with Steve Jobs. By 1977, sales were already
at $2.7 million
'I don't think he imagined it would be this big. He's left behind a
psychological imprint that will ensure Apple continues to be
innovative long after his death.'
'After he came back the first time he fell ill, he made sure he
built a team that shared his philosophical approach to what is
'You eventually reach a point where the company has such
momentum of its own.'
While Jobs appeared to be a cool, calm operator, in his 20s he
was unsure that Apple would work. He took Ron aside as he
panicked about whether his computer dreams would work, or
if he would end up a broke failure.
'He asked me if he should go ahead with the Apple enterprise
because there were a lot of things he wanted to do… I said,
"Go ahead do the Apple thing… But it is a risk in that when you
have made a lot of money, don't forgot what you wanted the
money for." He forgot,' he says.
'I think he became so enamored with the job of making money,
the job itself became the driving force. I don't think the money
mattered to him as much as playing the game became the
driving force of his life.'
Big plans: Ron Wayne wrote the Apple I manual but left the
company when it was on the cusp of huge success
Despite his drive and hunger to make money, Wayne says Jobs
was relaxed about his personal style – and hygiene.
According to Wayne, Atari co-workers often moaned the
young innovator stank and appeared unkempt as he refused to
wear deodorant, shower or clean daily.
'Jobs was an extremely casual person,' Wayne says. 'He never
went to a tailor as his clothes never fit properly. His neck was
not big and he always wore big collars too large. He was never
a clothes horse. He cared about what he was doing only. He
didn't have diddly care about any of that stuff.
'When he came back from a trip to India he looked emaciated
and had suffered from many illnesses. He had very little regard
for his health and how he looked or appeared to others.'
Wayne eventually took a break from the design world to open a
stamp store near his home in Southern California.
'It took me a year to build a clientele. But I had a couple of
break-ins and bought a pistol to protect myself. But when I
thought about what I would do with it if I needed to use the
gun, I closed the shop and worked from home.'
Wayne then moved to a division of Japanese company STS
working on computer modems as chief draughtsman.
Life's a gamble: Designing slot machines was always Ron
His story: Ron Wayne pictured with a copy of his
autobiography, for which Steve Wozniak, to whom he's still
close, wrote the forward
He was poached by Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory
as a model-builder to create industrial facilities. He spent two
years building a fusion nuclear reaction plant model, but again
'I would be still with them today, but when they offered me a
job and asked where I had got my university degree that was
the end because I didn't have a college education.'
Wayne ended up at Thor Electronics in 1982, where he took
on the role of chief designer before he retired in 1999. He says
his proudest achievement was designing a cable box for Navy
Seals helping them communicate more effectively with a
communications box in a war zone.
After his topsy-turvy career, Ron retired to Ormond Beach in
Florida, buying a supersized mansion with a swimming pool,
games room, three-car garage and workshop.
Soon after, he suffered another blow of tragic luck.
'One day someone broke into my safe in my garage and took my
life savings. My life savings had been in metal – 145 ounces in
gold and vast amount of collectors coins.
'I couldn't get insurance on gold, the coins or cash. I had to sell
the house to recover and I moved to Nevada. It was hard and I
suffered a terrible loss.
'But I took the approach that I would not make myself sick over
it as well. I am 79 and doing well in terms of psychological and
mental health. I do not let these things affect me… It is a matter
of self control and how much you are willing to spend on
emotional response,' he says.
Reflecting on his career, Ron says, 'Every time I have worked
as a business man it has been flaming disaster. I was not
prepared to make it at Apple. I always hoped that I would meet
a character like Jobs who was more compatible to what I
wanted to do with my life. I prefer people more personable.'
Jobs and Wayne followed their separate paths until 2000,
when Wayne received a call from Jobs out of the blue inviting
him to the launch of a new Apple product.
'I was living in a stamp shop in Tucson, Arizona when I got a
phone call from Jobs. There wasn't much chit chat and he told
me he had booked a flight for me to come to San Francisco and
that I was staying at a hotel where his chauffeur would pick
'There was no 'Hello' and I wondered if there was an ulterior
Wayne attended the event, then spent some time with
Wozniak and Jobs, chatting about 'absolutely nothing.'
Temperamental genius: Wayne and Jobs couldn't see eye-to-
eye on business matters but after Wayne left Apple, Jobs
turned it into a billion-dollar company
'Then, Jobs said: "Great seeing you again." It was like, don't let
the door kick you in the ass on the way out, and I was back in
Tucson thinking, what the hell was that about?'
Wayne waited in vain to find out why he was invited to the
launch, but he never heard from Jobs again.
He was left shocked in 2011 when Steve Jobs' authorized
biography revealed a private discussion between Wayne and
Jobs regarding his sexuality.
'I understand I was outed in his book,' Wayne says.
'I didn't read the book and I don't know the context, but I don't
think he fully understood the implications of expressing this
understanding. I'm sure it wasn't vindictive, but I was taken
aback by it.'
The new biopic of Steve Jobs' life features Ashton Kutcher in
the title role. Ron says the film's protagonist looks like a young
Jobs – but he has no idea who Kutcher is.
I have heard the title Two And A Half Men but no more. I am
sorry. I am an anachronism.'
The film's producers appear to have left Wayne out of the
Jobs adventure, though.
'Typical. I am, after all, the unknown founder. But it's not
Following the loss of his life's fortune, Wayne moved to a small
mobile home in Pahrump, Nevada where he enjoys days working
on design ideas and watching old British dramas like Rumpole Of
'I built a modern slot machine with the old mechanical feel of the
old slot machines, where users hear the crash of coins when
they win. My idea was to put 40 machines together in the
corner of a casino to relive what it was like to gamble in the
'If I could I would do it today – if someone would help fund the
Saturday, August 10, 2013
Lick it with your tongue, the smudge will go away and you don't have to redo your nail...your saliva fixes it when you lick your nail.
A really great way to apply a BB cream...
Use a beauty and blender cream. And remember to run your beauty and blender cream under cold water before using it.
When applying lipstick...
Moisturize your lips before so your lipstick will last longer. You can use chapstick, lip balm or any other lip moisturizer
When applying blush...
Always allow two fingers from your nose to where the blush should start.
To make your manicure last longer...
Apply a clear coat once every two days.
To make your lips pouty...
Apply shimmery lip gloss, to the centre, top and bottom.
To prevent flaky mascara...
Make sure you close your mascara tube tight to keep its moisture.
For a clear skin...
Use a cleanser that contains salicylic acid
To manage oily skin...
Use blotting sheets.
Greasy hair solution...
Never apply conditioner to your roots. Only your ends and wash your hair every two days.
...More coming later...
"But... I already spent a fortune on that damn wedding!" Bryan said angrily.
I turned around so I can face him. "Well then, I will send you all your receipts!". And I stormed out of the room.
I went home immediately and gathered my clothes and stuff that fit into one suitcase. I didn't have anywhere to go at the moment. I was too embarrassed. They already didn't like bryan that much because they thought he was self-centered and egoistic. I defended bryan saying at least he was faithful to me... And now this.
Before I could even have second thoughts about leaving Geena's apartment, I went to the person who knew what was happening before I knew it myself. And I sincerely hoped that person considered me as family after all these years.
Adam never liked Bryan. He always told me that my boyfriend was up to no good. Or that he only thought of himself and would make me cry.
When he was suspecting that things were happening between Bryan and Geena, he would say things to me like:
"You are so naïve, Ash!"
"Open your eyes sometimes and stop trusting too much!"
"Sometimes, the people you trust the most, Ash, are the ones who betray you the deepest. Look around you, you might just understand what I'm saying".
So when I came to him that night, I didn't have to explain anything. He saw that my eyes were swollen and that I was carrying a suitcase with me. Without a word, he opened the door wider and let me in.
"How long have you known?" I asked him.
"Does it matter how long I've known?" He asked back. Although, he sat beside me on the couch, he offered no arm or shoulder for me to cry on. Adam is not a touchy person. But it meant a lot to me that he made me feel that he was there.
"How could they do this to me?"
He sighed "the most important thing is, what are you going to do about it?"
"She's pregnant" I said.
For a while, Adam was silent. I could tell he was brewing all his anger inside him. Then he said "I suppose I should beat the hell out of Bryan for getting Geena pregnant, but right now, I want to give him a shiner more for what he did to you".
I stared up at him, he smiled, which is something he rarely does. "You grew up with me Ash. You too are like a sister to me. Believe it or not". He chuckled humourlessly. "Now what happened to Geena, she's an adult now, she should know that her actions have consequences. I can't beat up Bryan if Geena participated in the act willingly. But you on the other hand...it was not fair what they did to you."
Adam took me in, but it had always been on a temporary basis. He's a little of a woman-hater...I think. A woman's presence in his luxurious bachelor's flat will kill him little by little.
But I was glad he allowed me to stay with him till I got get my act together. I intended to get my own apartment. If only the rest of my friends were rich enough to rent a two bedroom flat, I could crash with one of them. But until then, I'm the parasite living in Adam's guest bedroom.
"Are you okay?" Adam asked giving me another gentle shake.
"You were in all afternoon?, aren't you supposed to be working?" He asked.
"Not anymore" I shook my head.
He raised a brow " your boss sacked you?"
I sighed and then nodded. "Apparently, I'm no longer recommended to stand within ten feet of people that are getting married".
"I can't say I blame your boss". He said. "You made this breakup the centre of your universe,Ash. You have to stop this. You have to pull yourself together. Dwelling on what would have been will only make you twice the loser".
"I'm not a loser"
"Whatever" he rolled his eyes at me. "But it looks like that from where I'm standing. No job, no house and no boyfriend".
"Right. Remind me to look for an apartment as soon as I can stand up"
"As soon as you get a job, you mean". He said.
"Yes, that too".
He sighed "it's no secret that I want this apartment to myself, but right now, Ash, I'm the only one you have. I don't have a choice. I can't disown you. But I hate to see you deteriorating everyday. A week of moping is fine. It's been almost a month a month now. You are in worse condition than you were the day you showed up at my doorstep".
"I...I don't know what to do , Adam" I confessed.
"Yes, you do. Go out with your friends. Party all night. You can sleep around if you want to. Even I won't judge you". He said. "Just get out of bed and stop moping".
"I'm not moping!".
He snorted." You don't convince me".
I rolled my eyes and laid back on the bed.
"By the way, your mother called. She asked if I've seen you. When was the last time you talked to her? She was very concerned".
"Last week. Took her a long time to call you."
"Honestly, I'm the last person in our family they would expect you to run to." He said rising from the bed and heading towards the door.
"Adam..." I called.
He turned back to me.
How's...Geena? Bryan was asking her to get rid of the baby. Did...did they go for it?"
He raised a brow "why do you want to know? They can go to hell for you care. Don't ask again! Because if Bryan is on his knees begging for forgiveness, I will be the last person on earth to tell him where you are".
"Is he asking for my forgiveness?"
He sighed in frustration "the only reason he would do that is because he wants back the sixty grand he spent on your wedding preparations". With his last barb cutting through me, he strode out of the room.
Adam can be ruthless and careless with my feelings, but somehow I appreciate it that he doesn't lead me on or tell me lies to make me feel better. I can always count on him for the brutal truth. Maybe that's why I ran to him when I found out about Bryan's affair. Because I felt I had been surrounded by lies for too long and for once, I wanted the truth. No matter how painful it can be!
Whew! This is the first chapter... I hope you guys really liked it and if you did not, comment on why you did not like it! I did not write the story though. I will upload the second chapter very soon... Mwah!
"Fiona..." I sighed. " I think I need a little holiday". I said to her.
"Take one permanently, you are fired!" She said without blinking.
Nicole stood up in shock "fiona, you can't do that! You owe half of your success to her. She made you rich, for crying out loud, she's going through a rough patch. Anyone in her situation would be upset! I think you are being too harsh"
Fiona raised a brow at her "she deserves it, I lost two clients in one week just because of her".
"She gave you almost a thousand of them since she came to work for you". Nicole argued. "We wouldn't be where we are had it not been her".
"The reason she was that good is because I taught her well. I've given her a week to mope and cry over her broken engagement. It's been three weeks already! I can't jeopardize my business because her fiancé left her at the altar!"
"That is not true". I spoke for the first time since she fired me.
"Yes, that is not true!" Nicole agreed. "You didn't teach her anything, she was fresh,creative and dynamic. And she was the one that came up with the most ambitious concepts we ever used on the weddings we did for years. Right, Ash?" She looked at me as if she was begging me to defend myself.
I took a deep breath " what I meant was...it's not true that my fiancé left me at the altar". I said in a serious voice and Nicole looked at me unable to wipe the shocked expression off her face.
"That's great dear, at least it didn't get too embarrassing". Fiona said without a hint of emotion."Now before any other bride-to-be ends up in the same fate as you, I suggest you go. I thank you for your services, you are jeopardizing my business, I already lost two clients. I can't afford to lose more".
I don't know if I would feel heartbroken for what she said. Sure it was sad to see your boss not give you consideration, especially since she owes half of her company's growth to you. But at the same time, it was also a relief to know that I need not make another bride's dream come true. It's difficult for me since I myself was a bride-to-be but it did not last long enough for me to make it to the altar.
"Fine". I murmured. I took my bag and cellphone. "I do expect to receive my full benefits, Fiona".
She raised a brow "compared to the amount of business I would lose because of you? I'll be happy to give you your severance pay on a silver platter".
I rolled my eyes one last time and then I marched out of the room. Nicole was on my tracks the minute I got to the elevator.
"Get back in there Nic if you don't want to share my fate" . I warned her.
"You are out of your mind, Astrid!, you should fight this!, she owes you that much!" She insisted.
I shook my head. "Did you really think I didn't want this?" She opened her mouth as if to say something "goodbye Nic, I'll see you later".
"I'll talk to you later" she said as the elevator door closed behind me.
I exited the building and hailed a cab. There at the backseat alone with the cab driver as company, I lost it. I cried my heart out.
The new Mr and Mrs. Bryan Bryans! I heard the host announce excitedly. I held on to my new husband's arm happily.
Bryan smiled at me happily, his eyes were teary. He leaned forward to give me a kiss on the lips.
The place was magical. The garden outside the church was covered with moss green and brown sheets. I was warm in a pristine white gown. I wanted a long train but bryan had been afraid that he would somehow trip on it. I figured that was just his one request so I settled for a waist length one. The long lacy sleeves of my bolero jacket covered my arms. It barely showed flesh. My gown reflected the prudent, virginal bride that I am.
The cake was a perfect two tier with little green flowers as its base. The cake topper was a traditional bride and groom locked in a sweet embrace.
My bridesmaids, who were dressed in elegant moss green and brown swirled gowns, danced around us. With the two-inch heels that I wore, my violet eyes were almost the same level as bryan's brown eyes. He wasn't tall but it didn't really matter to me. He was my groom,my husband. He made this dream wedding come true. He agreed to make it exactly my way, the way I had dreamed it to be.
I danced happily in bryan's arms. Then the host announced a change of partners and I was whirled out of bryan's arms. I looked for him to find out where he had gone and then I saw him...in the middle of the dancefloor, dancing happily with a bridesmaid wearing a revealing moss green gown,a flower tucked on her right ear. She grinned at me mischievously and then she laughed the most malicious laugh I have ever heard in my entire life.
"This is my wedding! " I shouted at her, then I fell to my knees and started crying.
I felt someone reach out for me and forced me to stand up, it was my least favourite person in the world, Adam. He shook me and said "pull yourself together".
"I can't..." I said
"Will you wake up, Astrid?" He shouted at me.
I felt him shake me more intensely.
"Wake up!" He shouted.
The world whirled round me. I forced myself to open my eyes and found myself staring into a pair of intense blue eyes outlined by a handsome tanned face. I stood up from ny bed and stared at Adam.
He raised a brow at me.
"Are you okay?" He asked me.
I took a deep breath and tried to steady myself. then I slowly nodded.
"Your phone has been ringing non-stop". He told me. " I can't concentrate and I've got a pleading to submit tomorrow".
Adam is sort of my cousin but we are not really related by blood,although we grew up together He's my cousin's half brother. Ever since we were kids, we never get along too well. He's too frank, too tactless. He says what is on his mind regardless of who will get hurt or who will look like a fool.
I don't really know why I ended up in his apartment after my whole world fell apart. I shared an apartment with Geena, the beautiful barbie doll in my dreams. She is my first cousin, the closest friend I ever had since I was a kid . I've slept over in their own house more than I've slept in my own bed. That was why, it was only natural that we shared an apartment after college. Only that, it was not really my apartment, but hers. Uncle jack, Geena and Adam's rich father made sure they were well provided for.
Between the two of us, Geena was the wild one. She wasn't always smart but with her charms and looks, she survived all the challenges that came her way. Well, if she got away with humping my fiancé behind my back, she can get away with almost anything. Or maybe I was too...trusting, too naïve !
My ex- fiancé is an orthodontist. He was goal oriented and ambitious like me. When Geena needed a job that didn't really need a lot of pressure, bryan took her in. I was not worried. They both loved me. They would never betray me...or so I thought!
Back when I was still clueless, Adam had been dropping hints to me. Sometimes in a form of very a rude sarcastic remark. But since I was so used to him being rude, I just tuned him out.
But one evening, I planned to surprise bryan at work. I was about to open the door when I heard him and geena arguing.
"You have to get rid of it!" Bryan said angrily.
"I'm not going to get rid of it. I may have done plenty shameful things in my life but I won't kill my own baby!"
"Astrid will find out". Bryan argued.
"And you still plan to marry her after getting me pregnant?!". Geena said angrily.
" I already spent a fortune on that wedding she planned!, it was too extravagant. What do you want me to do? Call it off?"
"Oh really?, so you want me to call off my pregnancy instead?" Geena asked. I can't even believe you are even considering that. Perhaps, you should have considered checking your ten year old condom before jumping into the sofa with me!"
"Are you sure it's even mine?"
"How dare you bryan?" Geena fired at him. "We've been sleeping together for six months! I have never let any man touch me except for you!"
"So what do you want me to do?, choose between your pregnancy and my wedding? It's a difficult choice to make, you know?"
At that point, I couldn't take it anymore. I barged into the room which shocked them both. I stared at both of them, pasting a bored expression on my face.
"Oh sweetheart...we were just having a discussion about...a patient" Bryan struggled to lie.
I narrowed my eyes at him. "Really? Which patient?, your unborn child?"
They were both shocked to hear me say that.
"I've been standing here long enough, and I assure you, I don't need any explanations from either of you." I struggled to keep my voice calm.
"We'd like the colours moss green and brown". Estelle the happy bride- to- be was saying to me and my best friend Nicole. I watched her happy smile and dreamy eyes and I couldn't help but wonder if I looked as ridiculous as that when I was planning my own wedding.
Nicole smiled back at her enthusiastically .
"That's a good combination. So..."
"Jungle-like" I suggested cutting nicole mid-sentence.
Estelle stared at me for a moment and her dreamy smile threatened to fade away from her beautiful face. "Excuse me?"
Nicole glared at me with a hidden message that said: please, just shut the hell up if you can't say something nice!
"What she meant was earthly", Nicole said smiling back at estelle and from the somewhat constipated look at her face, I can tell that she was trying her best to pass on some of her enthusiasm back into the bride-to-be.
"No. I meant jungle -like, if I meant earthly, that's what I would have said." I said bluntly, which earned me another glare from Nicole. This time, her hidden message was: you are so dead. I raised a brow at her and flashed her a crooked smile that was meant to say: I already know that!
"Excuse me? Do you... have a problem with me?" Estelle asked reluctantly.
I sighed. " I'm sorry sweetie. I don't have a problem with you. I have a problem with green. Moss green to be exact. And since you are in malibu and are planning for a beach wedding, maybe you should take a look at yellow, orange, red and gold with maybe a bit of indigo?
I thought Estelle would tell me to get lost right then and there. It didn't really matter. I don't care anymore. Weddings used to be my thing. However, because of some recent events in my crappy life, it now gives me pain to see happy, blushing bride-to-bes. It is easier for me to imagine that maybe on the night of their fiance's bachelor party, he might be humping the stripper inside the big cake!
"I'm sorry Estelle, I know you like green..." Nicole started apologizing on my behalf. She didn't even bother to glare at me anymore. She knew I couldn't care less and we'd only look unprofessional if we spent half the time glaring at each other.
"My fiance likes green... I infact like orange..."
Unfortunately, I don't see green and orange going together with your theme. I hope you are paying for the wedding." I said under my breath.
"Actually I am" Estelle said raising her chin proudly.
I smiled at her. "Good for you! Then you should plan it exactly the way you want it. That way you get to keep your wedding ideas in case your fiance decides to marry someone else at the last minute."
"Might I have a word with you in private, Astrid?" Nicole asked me with a grave look on her face, that she was not even disguising in front of Estelle anymore.
"Sure". I said, smiling sarcastically. Then I turned to Estelle. "Please do consider choosing between orange and green. If I were you, I'd make it worth my money. Think of things that are green" I said trailing thoughtfully..."hmmm...like vomit"
"Now! Astrid" Nicole said pulling me up by the arm.
When we were outside the office, Nicole gave me a good slap on the face. It actually stung.
"Are you awake now?" She asked me angrily.
"What is your problem Nic?" I asked, rubbing my cheek with my palm.
"Pull yourself together Astrid! Or you are not only going to lose your dream wedding. You might lose your job as well!" She said to me. "Now stay here and I will talk to Estelle... alone."
Nicole started to go back to the conference room.
"Nic?" I called and she turned back to me with a raised brow. "If she picks orange, will I at least get credit for talking her into it?"
She glared at me one last time and turned her heel towards the conference room, hoping to repair what damage I might have caused.
I went to the pantry to get myself a cup of coffee. Nicole's slap wasn't powerful to wake me up but I knew she had a point. If I continued talking to Estelle the way I did, I would have another complaint against my name.
Last week, a client withdrew their account with us because the tulip-loving bride could not forget the story I told her a psycho killer murdering brides on their wedding nights and laying them on a bed of tulips afterwards. I made up the story of course but I didn't know she had such a wild imagination! So the groom refused to have us do their wedding claiming , we had traumatized his blushing bride-to-be. And now I'm pretty sure that if Estelle will still choose green, everything about her wedding will remind her of vomit.
And speaking of vomit,it makes me want to do so when I look around the office and I see reels of laces and bows of different colours. A single lace, a single bow makes me want to puke.
I picked up a bow that strayed on my table. There was a phrase inscribed on it "yours forever"
I snorted and threw the bow in my garbage bin. Forever is such a big promise. I don't believe any man can keep a promise as big as that. That's why divorce happens left and right. Any girl will be a fool to believe in forever. I, for one will be damned if I ever believe in that word again!
I was so lost in my own thoughts that I did not notice that nicole was already standing in front of me with a giant scowl on her face. I stared up at her for a while and then I sighed.
"Okay okay, I'm sorry, I messed up" I said, throwing my hands in the air.
"No, you did not mess up Ash, you deliberately sabotaged that meeting" .
"I did not"
"You did too". She said angrily and sat in front of me. "What is happening to you Ash?"
"Nothing" I replied. That was a lie. I know exactly what was wrong with me.
"You used to believe in this. This company is twice as big as it is when it started five years ago because of you. You've worked on this for five solid years and you are the best employee this company has ever seen...and now, you are throwing it all away. And in the process, you are also jeopardizing my future along with yours".
"No, I'm not!" I said defensively
"Yes you are!" And not only are you jeopardizing our futures, you are also jeopardizing the futures of the engaged couples who will step into this office!" Nicole let out a frustrated sigh. She stared at me, shaking her head.
I could go on and on in this imminent circle of denial forever. I could argue with her all I want but I knew she was right. I was being a bitch. And I was being difficult. And I couldn't stand to see another wedding in my life again...at least, not yet.
"What do you want me to do?" I asked her. "Do you want me to file my resignation?"
Nicole rolled her eyes "no, silly! But I think you should take some time off! I think you should refrain from talking to engaged couples...until you get back on your feet" . She tried to smile encouragingly.
I sighed. "I guess you are right. The sight of this very place makes me want to puke already! And I don't think I can stand to see another wedding again. Please! The thought of it not ending in happily ever after is enough to make me want to hang myself!"
"Good! Because that is exactly what our clients want to do after they meet you". A familiar voice said behind me.